So I get ready to move in about 3 days. S C A R Y ! ! ! I knew this day would come, but just not so fast. It kind of feels like I'm starting all over. I thought it would feel more natural to move back to Michigan. Having grown up in Detroit and all, it just seemed like it would be a home coming. Nothing is further from he truth. I'm leaving behind 11 years of history, friends, memories, difficulties, frustrations, and familiarity. These things tie you to a place you know? Rather than a Michigander coming back home, I feel like a Minnesotan leaving home.
That's not to say I'm not totally excited about what's in front of us. I'm going to be less then 4 hours from any one member of my family, I get to live in one of the most beautiful places in Michigan (can I say the country?), work with a Pastor I have already grown to love and respect personally and professionally, get to know great new people, be part of growing and building an amazing church and more!
I just wish I could somehow take hold of what's in front of me without letting go of what I have now.
And that's the problem I guess. Moving on means letting go. Israel had to leave Egypt to get to the promise land. Egypt wasn't always a land of slavery, it started out as a land of supply, provision, and God's plan. It's not too hard to understand why, even though they were headed for God's will, the Israelites longed for Egypt after they left. They too had a hard time letting go.
I think if I were to stay here, what has been God's provision and blessing would become a place of slavery. God has a plan for Julie and I in Michigan, and it's a land full of milk and honey, (or at least sand and water....) but in order to get there we have to let go and literally move.
I feel like the Israelites in the desert--the place of limbo. We're not yet where God wants us, but we've left where we were. I find myself asking, "God have you called us to leave Farmington so we can die in Grand Haven?"
The nagging question in our conscious and subconscious minds is, "if we let go, what will we hold on to to keep us safe and secure while we wait for God's plan to be fulfilled?" "What about our friends, what about our house, what about Julie's job, what about our dogs, what about our future? If we let go, what else can we hold on to?"
I guess there's always Jesus--but for some reason he never seems like enough.
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4 comments:
Since we live right around the corner for ya know, can we come and help you move? Call us and let us know what time/day 8)
i can identify with all you say and more, it takes a great deal of courage to make yourself transparent for everyone else out here to observe, but, if they, like me, read this blog real well - they will see a young couple really bent on following the vision that God has set before them, 'no bars hold'! for that, God will surely bless you two more than you can imagine - both materially and spiritually....
Marc...I just sense in my spirit that your best days are ahead! We are ready for you and Julie to join us in West Michigan. With God's help...we are going to see HIS KINGDOM come!!!
PB
Hey Pastor Marc,
I didn't know that you moved. Congrats! So, where are you now in the alien planet of Michigan? Are you still in the Pastor business or what? Did you like my interview paper?
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